 |
 |
 |
E-Honora: GRAWA’s
Electronic Newsletter |
|||||||||||||||||||||||
GRAWA and Dataflow presented a CLE “The Divas of Domestic Relations: Nancy Peck and Joan O'Byrne,” on Wednesday evening, June 28, at Joan's historic home on Prince St. Sixteen women attorneys heard Joan and Nancy's perspectives on topics such as custodial evaluations and managing the difficult client.
Nancy shared tips on how to keep your client under your control while at the same time integrating his or her participation into the case. Clients will remember about 25% of what they hear if they are highly stressed, Nancy said, which is often the case in matrimonial disputes, so she gives each client a written description of the process their case will take, and an explanation of the law that governs it. She also thoroughly explains her office procedures, for example, how soon client calls are returns. She trains her staff so they are part of her team. They know enough to date stamp every document and send a copy to the client the day it is received, whether their attorney is present that day or not.
Nancy often gives her clients “homework” after an appointment; something to work on to make them invested in the process. She tells them, “I don't have to live with the result, you do.” To discourage excessive telephone calls and e-mails, she suggests her clients make a list of their questions and bring it to the next appointment.
She shared her experiences with the “scary and damaged”, and suggests that all domestic relations practitioners have psychological training for help in dealing with the extraordinarily disturbed client. She warns that depressed clients who suddenly become happy and calm, like a load has been lifted, may have resolved to commit suicide. Know who their therapist is and don't be afraid to call him, she advised.
If a client is threatening or combative to the point where you can not properly serve your other client, she said that is the time to get out of the case.
Joan discussed trends in custody disputes. “Twenty years ago, Mom was practically guaranteed custody, child support, and maintenance. Now, thanks to New York's Child Support Standards Act, there is more of a financial reason to obtain custody.” Further, Joan pointed out, today's fathers are not content to be “Disneyland Dads.” They want to be as involved as they were when the family was intact.
A trend in downstate custody cases is the reliance on custodial evaluations. Courts are ordering the parents and children to undergo psychological evaluations by a therapist. Some of the courts are relying on the therapist's report, instead of the testimony from the parties, to make the custody determination. This trend has not taken a firm hold here, she said, but warns that it may come. She and Nancy agreed that the report is full of hearsay because the therapist's conclusions are drawn from what the therapist was told by teachers, employers, or counselors. Both practitioners advised that lawyers oppose any request for custodial evaluations unless they are certain the adverse party has severe psychological problems. You never know what's going to surface in the report, warned Joan. “Your best witness in a custody case is your own client,” she said. A parent doesn't have to be bright or articulate to be a good parent. She just has to “be there” for her children. Also, few people in Rochester have the credentials to do these evaluations properly. “Never underestimate the power of the lack of credentials,” Joan advised.
Nancy and Joan agreed that the most important document in the file is the client data sheet. They suggested the client fill out a fact sheet with relevant dates of births and marriages, and contact information for the spouse and children. Medical information is critical, too. Having the client fill it out assures that the attorney will not be accused of having made a mistake, Nancy advised. Both attorneys suggested it be attached to the front of the file, accessible every time you work on the case.
Jennifer Natalie, GRAWA's CLE chair asked how these busy practitioners handle the stress of their practices. Nancy says “be good to yourself. I work out daily.” Joan plays a mean game of tennis and tends her extensive gardens herself.
Attendees praised the program's informality, the gracious setting, and the opportunity to hear the kind of advice you can't get from any book. Joan's home was built by Hiram Sibley, the founder of Western Union. It was placed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1974. Many U. S. presidents have been guests there. Joan treats her home as an architectural gem and a public trust, and enjoys showing it off to guests.
The event was slated to be held outdoors on the patio overlooking the grounds, but rain poured down as guests arrived. Elaine Cole, moderator of the program, quipped, “The Lord must have said, ‘these women put asunder what I have joined together; let it rain on them'.”
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||
Copyright
©
GRAWA. All rights reserved.
www.grawa.org |